It can be quite challenging when it comes to receiving feedbacks or complaints from other people. Mainly it’s because we tend attach our self-worth to performance, and have unrealistically high expectations for ourselves. We often get defensive when we receive comments that question our fragile self-worth.
Yet in order to grow and improve as employees, leaders, partners, and humans, it’s essential that we’re always open to feedback.
Realize that uncomfortable feeling is completely normal
Most people will do anything and everything to prevent that uncomfortable feeling. But feeling uncomfortable is a normal and necessary part of life. We need to grow by allowing ouself to face the discomfort and accept what is being said. Try to let go of our ego and trust that the comments will only benefit us.
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Growth areas is a good
Never forget that every feedback is a chance to keep growing. We need to realize if we think we’re already good, we can be more amazing! There’s no telling what we’re capable of once we acknowledge and bring attention to those areas! If we had no areas to improve, it only proves that we have maxed out our potential.
Keep in mind “state” vs. “trait:”
Sometimes we come up with ridiculous assumption when we receive feedbacks, reality is it’s just our minds that’s playing tricks with us. Someone tells us “This asset isn’t on-brand,” and we hear “You’re a bad employee.” Always keep in mind that those comments don’t necessarily mean we’re a poor employee/bad person/failure.
Keep yourself optimistic at all times. Try to see things from a different perspective. Recognize that our weakness is likely coming from a good place, and has positive side to it. For example, shyness might can also be conscientiousness, paranoid can be perceived as perfectionist.
Use mindfulness and self-compassion to react in a productive way
There’s nothing wrong with the uncomfortable feeling we get, it’s the reactions to the feelings that can be destructive. Which is why self-compassion is important, treat ourselves with compassion and believe that we are good enough. We can respond in a constructive way (e.g. “Thank you for the feedback and how improve where I can”).
Credits to: Megan Bruneau